Happy 12th Anniversary, Dearie! (and what Kept Us Going Strong)

Every year, I will take time to do a blog post on this special day.
This year, my heart is filled with gratefulness.
I recalled what it was like 14 years ago...

• I loved his smile
• I loved his mannerism
• I loved his calmness
• I loved his intelligence
• I loved his wittiness
• I loved the sense of security and reliability he radiates so naturally.

Then I remembered the day he proposed 12 years ago...

• unromantic
• shy
• and that cute pinkish blush on his face 

And now, looking at the same man, whom I have been sharing the same bed with for the past 12 years...

• His smile remained
• His mannerism improved
• His calmness had been tested with 'fire' and now it glows
• His intelligence is still something that continues to impress me
• His wittiness has not diminished a single bit
• The sense of security and reliability he gives is reaching perfection
• From an unromantic man, he now knows how to create little romance in everyday life
• Well, his shyness are almost gone but I could still manage to turn his face pinkish with a little teasing now and then.

I am thankful that the good Lord sent him to me at the worst possible moment of my life to lift me up.

I am also thankful for the first 8-9 years of difficult times, which we went through together slogging 12hours or more a day, 7 days a week, to feed ourselves and the children.
Without that hardship, our marriage foundation would NOT be this strong.

I am truly grateful for maintaining the openness in our communication.
Maybe its because our horoscope matches.
Maybe its because our ba-zi matches.
Or
Maybe simply because we continued to respect and love each other.
To speak with an open heart and mind.
And to continue to achieve our common goal.

I realised many married couples do not have a common goal.
They get married.
Have a (few) bundle(s) of joy.
They worked hard to make sure the family survives.
And that's about it.

I realised that couples with a common goal, respect each other more, understand each other deeper and communicates better too.

To me, a 'healthy' marriage life is simply being IN LOVE:
Intimacy
Never Blaming


Listen
Offspring
Variety
Eternity

Intimacy is more important than you think
There are a lot of difference between Sex and Making Love.
Go think!
*wink*

Never Blaming each other
When things go wrong, especially when its terribly wrong.
Point the finger AT YOURSELF
and things will work out
wonders will happen.

Listen to what your spouse has to say
Listening to not just what was said
but to why those words were said

Offspring to complete a family
To me, offsprings, aka children, are reminders
Reminding you and your spouse how in love you feel towards each other
So In Love that you are willing to JUMP into this commitment

Variety is spice to any marriage
Staying the same end up being a routine
Do things differently keeps that spark alive
Find NEW things which the two of you can do together
Find NEW goals which two of you must work as a team to achieve

Eternity in Mind will go a long way
To my surprise, many couples does not have Eternity in their mind when they get married.
I have so many friends and relatives who tell me that marriage is unpredictable and no point staying together as a couple when they do not see eye to eye anymore.
To me, that is a super lousy mindset!
I believe in Law Of Attraction.
If you already have the thought that one day there is a chance that you two will be separated, then, guess what?
That day will come!

Has it become a habit that you two are together?
Or are you still IN LOVE with your spouse?

Are you having a 'healthy' marriage?
Or are you passing each day with the same routine?

I am thankful that Allan and I are and will continue to be, for the rest of our lives.

Happy Anniversary Dearie! *muack*